Lonely won't leave me alone

I tried, I tried, but you won't let go

It's a pain that won't go away

Lonely won't leave me alone

~The Arlenes

Any day now

by Missy Higgins.

How long, how long, how long will we take to come undone?
If you know the answer tell me now
And I'll write up a calendar for our count down
'Cos what if what we see is all, is all we've got?

Say you've kept some fire aside
To set light to me some surprising night
And say you've locked some fire away
To set light to me some surprising day
To me some surprising day, any day now...

How come, how come, how come
I'm now on a road holding out my thumb?
If you know my destination please
Buy me the fastest car and throw me the keys
'Cos what if what we see is all, is all we've got?

Say you've kept some fire aside
To set light to me some surprising night
And say you've locked some fire away
To set light to me some surprising day

'Cos finger by finger we're losing grasp
And I'm questioning the reason why nothing beautiful does last

Say you've kept some fire aside
To set light to me some surprising night
And say you've locked some fire away
To set light to me some surprising day
To me some surprising day...

Any day now

For DJ...

The topic of best friends has come up a lot for me lately.


Someone asked me what I think the difference is between a friend and a best friend, and this got me thinking about my own friends. This list is for them, and is dedicated to Miss DJ, who has been there for me through some tough times lately.

She is my best friend because...


She's always been there, even when things were really difficult



She listens to me when I'm not making any sense (which is a lot of the time)



I find that I can tell her anything, without fear of judgement





She knows just what to say to make me laugh when I'm down



I trust her implicitly, because she's never once broken my trust





She just understands me in a way that no one else does, we're so alike and yet so different, she just "gets" me, my humour, and the stupid things I say that no one else finds funny



She never judges me, she accepts me for everything that I am, the good as well as the ugly





Whatever choice I make, she gives me her support. She's always on my side no matter what, and she never tries to control me



She knows my faults, and the mistakes I've made, but she never brings them up to throw them back in my face



She knows my secret fears, the thoughts I tell no one else, she's seen me cry and has laughed with me countless times



We rarely fight because we are honest with eachother, upfront, we're not afraid to tell eachother the truth



We never find ourselves without something to talk about, no matter how pointless a conversation it is



She is a kindred spirit, my soul sister. I can't imagine my world without her

My Skin

My Skin by Natalie Merchant

Take a look at my body

Look at my hands

There's so much here that I don't understand

Your face saving promises

Whispered like prayers

But I don't need them

No, I don't need them

Contempt loves the silence

It thrives in the dark

With fine winding tendrils

That strangle the heart

Oh I need the darkness

The sweetness

The sadness

The weakness

I need this

I need a lullaby

A kiss goodnight

Angel sweet

Love of my life

Oh I need this

Do you remember the way you touched me before?

All the trembling sweetness I loved and adored?

Is it dark enough?

Can you see me?

Do you want me?

Can you reach me?

"Who, being loved, is poor?"
Oscar Wilde

What can I say? Life is good.
It is full of unexpected suprises. One minute all seems lost and the next I am on top of the world. Things change constantly and I welcome the change. It always turns out to be for the better.
I am all smiles =)

Smile

And then, just when all seemed lost...

Something happens that changes everything...

Do you know how much you make me smile?

=)

The final year...

Year 12 means...

Time moving so fast

Old friends, new friends

Saying goodbye
Opportunities
Family
Growing up
Stress
Homework
Band
Singing
Tears... both the happy and sad kind

Lasting memories
Excitment
Boredom
Taking risks
Inside jokes
Suprises
Relationships
Breaking up
Moving forward
Learning every day


I never want this year to end

Life is all about ups and downs. Going through the motions. Feeling like the whole world has come crashing down, regretting decisions... feeling lonely and out of balance... but things always get better. Sometimes it's something small, something a friend says that makes you smile, listening to a good song or reading something inspiring.


But I've realised that it really comes down to choice. I can choose to feel miserable because of _____ or I can seize the day and enjoy life despite the people and things that seem determined to get me down.

It's easy to get caught up in silly, superficial drama, and sometimes that's okay, but there's so much more to life than that.

Sometimes you have to let go of things to move forward, to heal, to find balance again.

We can't change the past, but we have power over the present, and we can choose what we let affect us every day.

I don't have any regrets, everything I've done has brought me here. But I'm going to choose not to be affected by things that, really... don't matter!

Life is for living, for learning, for loving.